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Friday, January 25, 2008

I don't really believe in funerals, but...

So, yesterday we had the funeral for Uncle George. He was a simple man and wanted none of the big ceremonious wakes, funeral, etc. So there was a 20 minute service at the church and then we went to the military cemetary for his burial. Going to the cemetary was very moving because all you can see for the longest time is rows and rows of white headstones with names, branch of military and birth and death dates. Realizing how many people served this country during all the wars is inspiring. Also, realizing that this is just one of many national cemetaries is enough to make you pause to think about just how many truly gave all. Of course, most of the dead there did not die in military service, but just thinking about how many had to face those tasks as young men and women is enough to make you stop and realize just how lucky we are to have those people.

So, I have no intention of having a funeral or wake when I go. It all seems so morbid and stressful for no reason. I understand the need for closure for the family, but it would make me happy to know that when I am gone, my friends and family might do something memorable on their own to honor my memory. For example, anyone who makes fried chicken and mac&cheese thinks of me when they do it now, so after I am gone, just imagine how close they will feel to me. Or, if they make a quilt or teach a class. There I am again! Raise a chicken? See a small farm? See, you just won't be able to get rid of me. I will be gone, so what is the point of "honoring" me at a sad ceremony that I really won't be attending:)? We should all just do it now and make memories that will withstand the years that follow a loss, instead of grieving it later. Uncle George left a million laughs and great stories behind. That will always be with us when we get together at holidays and remember old times.

3 comments:

Bonne said...

I agree with your thoughts completely! I love that you put it all down in words. hugs, B

smoothiejuice said...

I am so glad you have so many great George memories..and yes..think of me when i die when you do something, none of this somber boo hooo stuff...please! You are so right Sheryl!

Sheryl-lyn said...

It seems so many of us don't want or need that funeral/wake stuff. Besides, it just leaves your family with another expense that is outrageous for no purpose!